a good example
Make sure you're not setting a poor example yourself. Many adults use name - calling or
foul language to express their annoyance and they may do it unconsciously, the children
are almost conscious of it rather use sentences like "You're making me angry",
"This is not the way you say"
Swearing is a form of verbal violence. Many a times it goes unheard of, as expressed
between the lips. It is used usually in appropriate surroundings.
Payal, a young child of five, had picked up bad language at home. She had picked up words
and expressions from adults at home. She stayed in a big joint family of 10-12 people.
Very often, Payal wrote some words on the back of her book and on the walls of the
bathroom. She usually used them, when she was angry or irritated. She had learnt it from
adults, who used these words frequently as a part of their daily language. In school,
these words were commonly heard e.g. " shit, damn, hell, bum, etc".
Payal at first used it as fascination words, but soon it became part of her daily language
skills. She often did it also, to provoke and manipulate the adults at home.
She was taken to the child guidance clinic. It was made clear to the parents that Payal
was using a lot of imitation strategy and that it was better if they controlled their
language swearing at home. Also, little attention was to be given to her, when she tried
to gain attention.
It was explained to Payal, that her language offends people. Everytime she said a bad
word, she would be missing out her favourite T.V program.
She was asked to make a chart, where she would give herself stars or coins the day she
missed saying her bad words. In this way, Payal became more conscious of her language and
it was possible to deal without hypocrisy, without situations like swearing in front of
visitors. She learned to control her anger, by rationalizing with the situation rather
than swearing in between her lips.